memories & superchick

When the song "Stand in the Rain" by Superchick debuted, I was living on my own in a little rural town in southwestern Oklahoma attending University. Besides going through a difficult break-up, I was homesick and alone and struggling under the weight of both. When the song drifted through the radio speakers in my car one evening,  It spoke to me, and as tears flooded my eyes, the weight on my chest finally eased off a little and I knew it was safe to breathe again. 

"...So stand in the rain

Stand your ground

Stand up when it's all crashing down

You stand through the pain

You won't drown

And one day, what's lost can be found

You stand in the rain." (Superchick lyrics)

That's why when the Warnors Theater listed "Superchick" as an upcoming concert, I instantly dialed my husbands desk phone and insisted we get tickets. 

Last night, he & I and my brother, Reuben, raced to downtown Fresno in Reuben's tiny Saturn after having to make a last-minute stop for gas. We quickly picked up our tickets at the "will call" window and then, after a bit of confusion from some general admission ticket holders, claimed our seats front and center in time to watch the opening bands Bread of Stone and SameState, both of which were pretty awesome. 

And then the lights dimmed for the main event as the band we had all waited for took center stage.

The show was phenomenal (and I haven't used that word in years but Superchick so deserves it). We sang, we danced, we learned some new dance moves, but most importantly we felt God's love reflecting through the lyrics and joy radiating throughout the space. Some songs I had only heard a few times but many were old favorites and flooded my heart with memories. 

I remember my dear friend Drew who I met years ago at summer camp. I remembered his life struggles, his pain, his hopes and dreams and how despite negative influences trying to rob him of his faith and joy, he found his hope in Christ and sang Superchick songs as his anthems to help him through dark times. 

I remembered an even older memory of the very first time I ever saw the band in concert. I was only fourteen years old and very shy, while Superchick was wild and crazy and out of my comfort zone. I remember watching them sign autographs, seeing them smile at me when I was too shy to approach them , but realizing that these people were radiant. Though I was unsure of their music at the time, I was certain that they loved God and that they were simply trying to share the message of hope with the population. I remember the girl in my youth group who was also at that concert and accepted Jesus as her Savior that night. I saw her a few days later at church and I could just see Jesus radiating from her face. She was so happy as she joined our prayer circle and took my hand. She was killed in a car accident later that week. I will never forget the sadness I felt when I heard the news. But I will also never forget the hope and the peace that I felt knowing that she had found truth and that she was now living with the Savior she had been introduced to. 

Superchick challenged me: as a person, challenged my beliefs, my pre-conceived notions about what constitutes worship, challenged me to be bold, to stop hiding behind my flaws and insecurities and to become the girl God intended me to be. 

As I danced and rocked and sang with Superchick last night, I remembered all of this. And I remembered that God is more powerful than circumstances; that he gives me a hope and a future; that I simply have to trust him with my life. 

Thank you Superchick for that reminder, 

and for those of you reading this, thanks for making it this far with me. 

Let's see where God takes us in this new year...

<3 Bethany

seven months later..

Look who turned 7 months old, today:

Oliver Aiden.

Each new day, Oliver grows a little more

and learns something new.

He learned to crawl this past month.

Almost immediately after that, he figured out how to stand up 

by holding on to stationary objects 

such as the couch, mommy or daddy's legs, chairs, tables, etc. 

Look out, world, little elf is on the move.

"Please be content with crawling for a little longer, " 

I silently beg my rapidly growing baby.

The muscles in my arms have strengthened from carrying him.

Even so, I still need a rest from time to time,

reminding me that the infant we brought home seven months ago

is fast approaching toddlerhood. 

I love every minute I spend watching this amazing little miracle of human life.

We play games now, 

Oliver & I.

As he sits in his highchair watching me wash the dishes or cook dinner.

He stares at me until I notice him and smile.

Instantly a huge smiles spreads across his face

and he gives me one of his fantastic baby laughs.

I dance for him, he giggles and waves his arms.

I try to feed him applesauce on a spoon.

Sometimes he loves it, 

more times he dramatically makes gagging sounds 

and spits it out. 

He shakes his head back and forth 

and repeats baby sounds over and over again.

I say them back to him and he laughs gleefully. 

And he drives me absolutely insane.

This is a thing he L-O-V-E, loves to do.

He crawls to the brick fireplace and stands against it, 

wobbling dangerously on his little toes.

I rush over and pull him away, bribing him with toys, books,

blocking his way with pillows.

Oliver scales the pillows and is back at the fireplace the minute I turn my back, 

all the while smiling his sweet little prankster smile.

And all the emotions Oliver brings me are insignificant compared to this 

overwhelming love that I feel for him, 

my baby boy.

I pray that God gives you many more days and months and years of life,

so I can watch you grow and learn and become who God created you to be.

For you, O Lord, are my hope, my trust, O Lord, from my youth.

Psalm 71:5 ESV

another year.

Happy Birthday Little Brother...

Seventeen years ago today, my "baby" brother was born. I remember that he somewhat resembled a frog, with his long body and legs and his dry skin. He was two weeks overdue and weighed ten pounds at birth. I tried to explain to Oliver that his Uncle Reuben was born seventeen years ago and that's quite a long time considering Oliver was born just six and a half weeks ago. I'm not sure if he fully grasped the concept. He just smiled and made faces at me. I, however, am fully aware of the time that has flown by. When I look at the little brother who has finally grown taller than me, I remember that long froggy baby that I was sometimes allowed to carry. Despite how heavy he felt in my arms, I pretended it didn't bother me so that my mom would let me hold him longer. Well I certainly can't carry him anymore but I will hug him tightly when I see him tonight for his birthday dinner. And, I will wish him a very happy birthday and a wonderful year as he enjoys the gift of life that God has blessed him with. We love you not-so-little brother...

May this year bring you new experiences, joy, laughter and peace.

~ B.

t.g.i. finally f.

"Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good! His faithful love endures forever." Psalm 136:1 NLT

I absolutely love Fridays...

There is a feeling that it brings; a feeling unlike any other day of the week. It's a combination of anticipation and relief, sort of like the feeling you get on the last day of school. Yes, that's it. Fridays are like a mini last-day-of-school and I just love them. Oliver & I get to spend two full days with Poppa, and my sister Toya always visits us on Friday evenings which means Oliver gets lots of love from his sweet auntie. Yes, Fridays are always fabulous in our little world.

The weather today is pleasantly warm in comparison to the heat we endured this past week. The windows in our tiny apartment are open to welcome the light breeze and Oliver is curled up on my chest enjoying a nap, giving me lots of time to catch up with the blogging world.

This week, Nick let me enjoy a quick shopping trip to Macy's and I picked up a few fabulous finds. These O'neall Everytime denim Walkshorts are quickly becoming my new b.f.f.

They are super light unlike most denim, perfect for summer, and the vintage wash gives a subtle nod to stonewashed jeans without looking tacky and outdated. Originally priced at $39.50, they were marked down to $24.99 but rang up at $19.99 and with my coupon, I paid just $12.99 for this awesomeness.  I just love them.





In other news, Nicholas and I may be renting a house in a few months when our lease ends, fingers crossed for it to work out. I am beyond excited at the thought of having so much space for Oliver to grow and learn and play. I am trusting God to work everything out for the best and also feeling very blessed with my beautiful perfect little boy and my loving husband. I'm feeling hopeful for this summer and I can't wait to see what God has in store for us.

Happy Friday blog world :)

~B.